What My Children Remember

What my children remember about me as they were growing up absolutely enthralls me. It is a never-ending treasure trove of what I was like – and still am! First, let me say that I considered them “partners in crime.” I will always think that I somehow managed to clone myself twice. We moved an insane number of times, and I tried to be the “constant.” It never occurred to me to be other than myself even if I had to explain myself. I expected them to learn from it.

The move to Brightwood, Oregon was pivotal. My daughter was in 4th grade, my son was in preschool. There – in a sweet log cabin with a creek in front and the river behind, the three of us grew from the heart out, while husband commuted. My tendencies to take up “causes” and be proactive bloomed to full flower.

I joined Green Peace, The Atomic Decommissioning Alliance and assorted human rights groups. When the Japanese ambassador came to Portland, I took part in a major protest – kids and all. I helped carry the Green Peace banner while my children carried posters they had made reminding the world that “whales are people, too.” I wrote a funding plea for saving the Harp Seals from slaughter. I was invited to go to the ice floes and help rescue the baby seals, as the Japanese attempted to kill them for their pure white fur. The scientific meaning of their name is “lamb of God.” My plea for funding was based on that. My darling children took all this to heart.

So, the other day, when I was reading an article in Harpers, I ran across the name Steve Biko. It resonated in my head, but at age 79, the mind is slow to clarify. Human rights came to mind. I decided to ask my daughter why I felt a strong personal involvement with this man. “Mom,” she responded, “you tried to save his life!” “Explain please,” I answered. She continued, “Remember Chris’ tutor, Mrs. Elliott?” I did – clearly. She lived on a farm up the road in Brightwood and shared my concern for human rights. My main concern at the time was that Steve Biko, a cofounder of the South African Students Organization, had been jailed wrongly.

The South African Students Organization was a group of black students focused on resisting Apartheid. Steve Biko had been jailed numerous times. Mrs. Elliott and I organized a group of like-minded souls who saw the evil in Apartheid. They were also willing to speak up against this evil. Funds were needed to secure Mr. Biko’s release from police custody. Our group was trying to raise a substantial sum of money to aid in his release. This was the Fall of 1977. A short time later, upon his release, this eloquent and determined young man died of injuries sustained while in custody. It all came back to me as my daughter spoke.

Steve Biko was well-educated and spearheaded the Black Consciousness Movement. At all times he advocated for the improvement of black citizens’ rights. He never gave up. He created trust funds to aid political prisoners and their families. He became friends with Donald Woods, a South African journalist. Their association is recreated in the 1987 film “Cry Freedom.” This is what my children remember. So do I.

Caring about the world around you is the beginning of change, it is the best medicine.